The Definition of Insanity
by WeirdWolf
Summary: They say the definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over again and expecting a different result.


Title: The Definition of Insanity

Summary: They say the definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over again and expecting a different result.

A/N: I had the idea to write this story based on the events of the short Batman comic "24 hours".

Disclaimer: I write for entertainment purposes only and no profit is being made from the creation of my stories or poems.

* * *

Harley Quinn sat across the desk from her therapist, waiting to hear the results of her most recent evaluation.

"Well, Harley." Dr. Leland began. "After your most recent competency hearing, and after seeing all the progress you've made over the last few months, you will be released tomorrow morning."

"Yay!" Harley exclaimed, nearly jumping out of her seat. "Thank you, Dr. Leland."

"You're very welcome, Harley."

Harley stood and practically skipped out of Dr. Leland's office, excitement pouring off her in waves.

In the hall, a guard was waiting to escort her back to her cell until the next morning.

"Did ya hear that, Bertie?" Harley beamed at the man.

Judging by the annoyed look on the man's face, whose name tag declared that his first name was 'Robert', he clearly detested the nickname she had given him.

"Yeah, Yeah, I heard it." Robert said without an ounce of enthusiasm.

His lack of excitement over the matter went unnoticed by Harley as she continued talking the whole way as they walked back to her cell.

When they finally arrived at her soon to be vacant cell, the guard reached for his keys to unlock the door.

"Dr. Leland had me to bring your stuff to your room." He said as he opened the cell door, gesturing toward the side of the room where her clothes and a brown suit case had been placed. "I'll be back in the morning, make sure you pack all your personal belongings and be ready before then."

"Sure thing, Bertie!" Harley replied as she stepped into the cell.

Once Harley was inside, the guard locked the door and walked away.

"Goodnight, Bertie!"

The guard mumbled something to himself on the way down the hall.

Harley plopped onto her bed, a wide smile on her face as she stared at the ceiling.

_Things will be different after today. _Harley thought to herself. _Tomorrow's gonna be a new start._

She closed her eyes and eventually drifted off to sleep.

. . . . . . . . . .

"Today's the day!" Harley said in sing-song.

Harley woke up bright and early to get a head start on packing. She changed out of her Arkham Asylum inmate uniform and into her regular clothes, and then started packing her belongings into the suit case.

She was almost finished when the guard finally arrived to open the door.

"You ready?" he asked.

"Just about." Harley said as she walked over to the wall and took down a picture of The Joker she had there and neatly placed it in her suit case, shutting it afterwards. "Ready."

"Alright, c'mon." The guard started down the hall, Harley followed.

Harley walked with a bounce in her step as she passed by cell after cell in the hall.

Along the way she saw Ivy and stopped.

"Hey Bertie, mind if I stop for a sec?" Harley asked the guard.

"Sure." He said flatly. "But make it quick."

Harley walked over to the cell which contained her friend and sometimes partner in crime.

"Hey, Red." Harley said.

Ivy, who had her back turned as she was watering the few plants she was allowed to keep in her cell, turned around.

"Harl." She said, walking over to the glass. "Heard you're getting out today."

"Yeah," Harley said. "I'm gonna try to stay out of trouble this time."

Ivy raised a skeptical eyebrow but said nothing.

"What happened, Red? I didn't even know you were back in here again." Harley frowned.

"Oh, I was trying to collect some seeds from a few rare plants when Batman caught me." Ivy sighed.

"Oy." Harley said. "And here I was thinking of staying at your place when I got out."

"You still can if you want." Ivy said.

"Really?" Harley brightened.

"Yes, really." Ivy said. "I need someone to water the plants there anyway."

"Alright, Red." Harley smiled. "Thanks."

"You're welcome, Harl."

"Alright, we need to get a move on." The guard said as he looked at the watch on his wrist.

"I gotta get going." Harley placed a hand on the glass. "See ya, Red."

Ivy lifted her hand to meet hers on the other side of the glass. "Bye, Harl."

They're hands lingered on the glass for a moment, slowly moving away as Harley started forward.

Taking one last look back, Harley continued on her way, following the guard all the way to the front gate of Arkham Asylum.

At the gate, Dr. Leland and a few of the orderlies were waiting to see her off.

"Take care, Harley. And try to stay out of trouble this time." Dr. Leland said as she shook Harley's hand.

"Don't worry, Dr. Leland I will." Harley then waved goodbye to the small crowd. "Bye everyone! Thanks again Dr. Leland! Bye Bertie!"

They all waved and said their goodbyes as Harley walked away.

. . . . . . . . . .

Harley had just arrived at the apartment she sometimes shared with her friend Ivy and was about to go in when a car came to a stop next to the sidewalk behind her, honking the horn twice.

_Who could that be? _Harley wondered.

She turned around. It was a black limo.

_Could it be?_

The back window rolled down to reveal that The Joker was in the back seat.

_it is! _Harley smiled.

"Hi, Harley." The Joker said with a smile as he opened the back door of the limo.

Within seconds Harley had abandoned her suit case on the side walk and hopped through the open door, practically tackling The Joker before he had a chance to step out.

Harley squealed with glee and wrapped her arms around him, catching him in a tight embrace as she kissed him.

"Mwah! Oh, Puddin'! Mwah! Mwah!" She said between kisses. "I've missed you so much!"

"I. . .missed. . .you. . .too." The Joker said as he struggled to loosen her grip.

A moment later he finally extracted her arms from around him and sat up straight.

"Now that that's out of the way," Joker said as he fixed the collar of his suit. "I have something important I wanted to ask you, Harley."

"What is it Mistah J.?" Harley asked as she stared at him through dreamy eyes.

"Well, word on the street is a shipment containing a collection of fine jewels will be arriving at the Gotham Jewlery Mart this afternoon." Joker explained. "The jewels are rumored to be worth thousands, and possibly millions!"

"Uh huh." She said half listening.

As Joker continued, the driver of the limo stepped up to the side of the vehicle, picking up Harley's suit case as he went, and tossed it into the back before he closed the door.

"So tonight we're going to blast our way in, grab the loot, and take off before Bat-Brain shows up." At the mention of Batman a angry snarl replaced the large smile on his face.

"Uh hu- Wait." Harley said as Joker's words sank in, snapping her out of her trance like state. "You mean we're gonna steal em?"

"Yes, of course we are, Harley."

"But, I can't." She frowned. "Dr. Leland says I've made so much progress. And I just got out, if I mess up they're gonna throw me back in and throw away the key for sure!"

An annoyed look crossed Joker's face for a moment at Harley's rambling, but it didn't stay there long as it was soon replaced with a devious smile.

"Now, now," He said placing his hands on her shoulders. "There's no need to worry."

She seemed to calm down. "There isn't?"

"Of course not." He smiled.

"But, I promised Dr. Leland I'd try to stay outta trouble this time." She said. "Turn over a new leaf, ya know that sort of thing."

"But just one more wouldn't hurt, would it?" He said.

"I don't know. . ." Harley said, a look of uncertanty crossed her face as she thought about it.

"Harley, baby, with the money we'll make off these jewels we could give up this life of crime, leave Gotham and start over somewhere new!" He exclaimed. "No one would ever even have to know."

"Really, Mistah J.?" She asked hopeful.

"Really." He answered, giving her his most charming smile.

She felt as if she was going to melt at the sight of his beautiful smile, the smile she'd almost give anything to keep on her angel's face.

"Alright Mistah J., I'll do it!" She smiled brightly as she suddenly reached forward, grabbing his cheeks in her hands, and pulled him toward her into a kiss.

The sudden action making Joker's eyes widen in shock as her lips met his.

After a moment the kiss ended.

"Oh, good!" Joker said. "I'm so glad that you decided to join in after all, Harley."

"Anything for my Puddin'." She sighed happily.

"Alright, now let's get things ready for later tonight." he said as he sat back against the seat, placing his arm around Harley's shoudler. A look of pure bliss on her face as she rested her head on his chest.

"Vinnie, take us back to the theater." Joker ordered the driver.

"Sure thing, Boss." Vinnie said in a gravely voice.

The driver immediately started the car and drove away, heading in the direction of the clown prince of crime's hideout.

. . . . . . . . . .

BOOM!

An explosion from within Gotham Jewlery Mart shook the small building, the blast shattering the store windows and sending shards of broken glass everywhere.

Inside, two security guards lay bound and unconcious on the floor of the front room of the shop.

Meanwhile in the back room of the store, smoke still lingered in the air from the explosives that were used to open the vault, its metal door had been blown off its hinges and lay in a smoking pile on the floor.

Inside the vault, the clinking of jewelry and other valuables could be heard as The Joker, along with Harley and a couple of Joker's thugs, were busy stuffing their sacks with anything they could find.

Joker and his men were wasting no time as they quickly searched the shelves and boxes within the vault, tossing handfuls and handfuls of gems into their bags.

Harley, on the other hand, had taken the opportunity to try on a few of the treasures as she collected jewels into her sack.

Picking up a golden crown, Harley placed it on her head.

"How do I look, Mistah J.?" She asked as she struck a pose.

Joker looked up at her, instantly a look of annoyance crossed his face.

"Harley, stop lollygagging around!" He snapped at her.

"Sorry, Boss." She said in a faint tone as she dropped the crown into her bag.

Behind them, a shadow passed the vault door.

"We have no time for dress-up," Joker said as he dumped a pile of diamonds into his bag. "Batman could show up any sec- OOMF!"

His words were cut off as Batman delivered a flying kick to The Joker's face, sending him to the ground.

Harley turned around quickly.

_Puddin'!_

"Joker." Batman said. "Why am I not surprised?"

Batman started to walk towards the Joker, but before he could come any closer, a hard kick from Harley sent him backwards.

"Stay away from my Puddin', B-man!"

Batman sat on the ground rubbing the side of his face where Harley's kick had landed just moments ago.

As Batman sat stuned for a moment, Joker reached into his jacket to grab his gun, keeping it hidden by his side as Harley helped him to his feet.

"Harley?" Batman said sounding somewhat surprised. "Didn't think you'd be back to doing this so soon."

After getting to his feet, Joker immediately pointed the gun at Batman.

Batman, now in a crouching stance, sent one foot flying forward, kicking the gun out of Joker's hand.

Seeing that he now had no other way out, Joker saw a chance to escape and took it.

Without warning, Joker pushed Harley forward, the sudden shove sending her crashing into Batman.

Laughing manically, The Joker, along with two of his henchmen, quickly made their escape, each with a bag of jewels in hand.

Finally managing to untangle themselves from each other, Batman looked at the retreating Joker and then back at Harley.

She smiled and laughed nervously. "I can explain?"

Batman just glared at her.

. . . . . . . . . .

Later that morning, a police van arrived at Arkham Asylum with Harley Quinn in tow.

After once again being admitted, a dispirited Harley was sent back to her cell by guard escort.

As she passed through the hall, Ivy spotted her and gave a little wave.

Seeing this, Harley half-hartedly waved back.

A few moments later Harley along with the two guards had arrived at her cell.

One of the guards opened the cell door as the other removed the handcuffs from her wrists.

Once Harley was inside the guards shut and locked the door, making sure it was secure before walking away.

Harley walked over to the bed and plopped down.

_Why do I always let myself get dragged into these things again and again? _She thought to herself and sighed. _Guess it's true what they say about insanity._

"Oy." she said out loud to herself

* * *

A/n: Thank you for reading :D I like to hear what my readers think of my work so please feel free to review :)


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